Thursday, December 27, 2012

Wow! This is pretty cool. I've finally gotten around to doing something that I've wanted to do for a long time. I've always been a writer at heart and I know that while I'm not the next great literary genius, I enjoy stringing words together to tell a story.

I've wrestled with the idea of what to blog about. My kids? Most of us may have kids and those of us who do naturally think our kids are the funniest ones around. My family? Yeah, we do put the "fun" in dysfunctional but what family is perfect? So I've been left with the struggle of what to blog about. What to do? What to write about? Then it hit me...

Standing in line in the grocery store one crazy Saturday, stuck behind a lady with more groceries in her cart than should have been legal, I began to scan the magazines. I won't mention any magazine names...I have nothing to be gained if I get sued but I just don't need that kind of headache. All the pretty girls flaunting the latest fashion trends, heels so high that I'm not sure they were actually wearing them. I think they were lowered over the shoes with some kind of circus harness...or maybe airbrushed into them.

And then right over "Miss I'm-one-of-the-beautiful-people-and-you're-not" there it was. The new issue of the magazine I typically read...because the recipes sound fabulous but everyone is tired of chicken, right? On the front in a huge, headache inducing lime green font was the dreaded "New and Improved Weight Loss Formula...Lose 20 Pounds in a Week!!"

Mind you, I'm intelligent. I know when I'm being snowed. But I couldn't resist it. This was going to be my lucky day! Not only did I save a buck fifty on my groceries thanks to the senior discount (no, I'm not a senior but who am I to argue about saving money?) but I'd found the magic cure for weight loss! Against my better judgement, I bought the magazine and drove home wondering what new scientific study was going to make me skinny this time. 

So there I was, kids off in their own world, dog happily chewing the couch (that's a whole other blog in itself), and I had the magic cure in my hands, so to speak. I quickly skipped over the recipes and went straight for the headline article. I scanned the first few paragraphs full of scientific blah-blah and read the diet itself. Common sense and memory kicked in. Didn't I read this same diet two months ago? The only difference was the amount of kale to toss into the blender. First of all...ewww! Second of all...they'd gotten me again!

That's when I made up my mind that I'd never buy another magazine that promised inside it's glossy pages was the miracle I'd been waiting for. Now, I know what most of you (if anyone even reads this) are thinking. "Diet and exercise! That's the key!" I'm good with that. And if I didn't have PCOS, that would work. Come to think of it, if I didn't have PCOS I probably wouldn't have bought that magazine anyway. I might have bought the one with the torture-device heels!

PCOS, or polycystic ovarian syndrome, is this whole disorder that throws your entire body off kilter. The insulin in my body doesn't work the way yours might and that translates into a whole other set, or sets, of problems that I don't have time to go into right now. So basically, no matter what radical new diet or health regime I take on,  I'm at the mercy of PCOS. And that's what this blog is about...I'm mad (a little angry and a little crazy), I'm fat (not like the poor bedridden people you see on the health channels), and I'm a woman full of crazy emotions and put-upon demands by family and work. Put those three together and you have me. My mission for 2013? Try not to be so mad or so fat. As I transition my life, I'll be sharing the trials, tribulations, insanity, and hilarious happenings I find along the way. 

I hope to be an inspiration, in my own twisted way, and that someone out there can relate...enjoy!

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